A Look Back at 2019

Even though the majority of my writing is now located elsewhere, I haven't forgotten this relic of my past.

Since 2009 I have written on this blog, and since 2010, I have ended the year with a post looking back on the events that have happened in the last 12 months.

This blog will likely continue to be mostly neglected, with the majority of my writing going to my new platform (see below) but I don't want to let it completely disappear, if only as a tie to life back in 2009 when blogs were just beginning.

In my jar was much less this year.

There were no races, as I spent the year working out at my favorite small gym, without any extra motivation needed to continue to attend besides the financial commitment. But I was consistent with my three times a week workout, except for the health issues that came up throughout the year.

The jar had our invitation to my cousin's wedding, as well as tickets to a fun Hamilton sing along I did with a good friend. There is the ticket to the Pet Expo, as well as a ticket to the Orange County Fair.

The only other physical evidence of the events of the year was some documentation of our first family road trip to San Jose early in the year for Remington's travel hockey team.

These small physical relics of the year miss most of the most significant events of 2019, which was back up to 2013 levels of unexpected turns. 

First, February was a tumultuous month of sickness in our house with one after the other of us falling victim to the flu, complete with long duration of fevers, and a double bad flu for Remington and I with his turning into pneumonia, and mine turning into bronchitis, with a painful cough that lingered for weeks.

Then we had relative calm until May, when out of the blue, I had intense joint pain in multiple joints throughout my body. After several tests it was determined that I had an autoimmune condition, most likely Lupus.

As this is a chronic condition, I will be dealing with some level of symptoms of this for most of my life, and you can read more about my reactions and processing of this below too.

Then in June, we had a double whammy of stressful situations with our family. My brother started divorce proceedings, and the beginning of that was very unstable and caused a lot of anxiety for everyone involved. It is still ongoing, but will hopefully be fully resolved by the end of 2020.

Also in June, Blake's brother and sister in law had a scare when she unexpectedly went into labor at 6 months, which is obviously bad. The decision was to put her on 10 weeks of bed rest to give their baby the best chance of staying put, which eventually became inverted bed rest, and she wasn't even allowed to leave the bed for bathroom trips.

We decided to invite them to live with us when that happened, so that I, who wasn't working during the summer, could watch both of my kids and her two year old so that she could be able to follow doctor's orders.

So, from the start of July until the middle of September, our house was wild with 7 people living in it, but it truly was a great time of bonding for the family, and we are so happy to have helped in such a stressful time. She made it to 8 months before she went into labor again, and had their baby, my nephew in September, who thankfully only had to stay in NICU for a few days before getting to be home with his family, and he is doing great now.

The end of the year has been a bit smoother, with me starting a new job at an elementary school as an instructional assistant, but I am able to get off in time to get the kids from school, help with homework and get them to their many various activities.

Currently, Remington is playing both club roller hockey and recreation ice hockey. His club season is going great so far, with two first place 6u wins and one second place.

He is also doing martial arts and soccer (and yes, there is a sport every day of the week).

Grace is still doing parkour and tumbling, and loving both. She is up to a green rank (third level) in tumbling, which means they are starting to teach her how to do flips and back flips.

She is also doing soccer, and it sounds like she wants to continue soccer going forward as well as her parkour.

So overall life is full, and happy.

My writing at the end of 2019

As I mentioned above, my free time is mostly spent writing these days, having revived my earlier excitement for it on a much more lively platform, where I can see what people are reading, read comments, comment on others' writings and basically feel more a part of a community when I write.

I publish often over there, and am likely to continue, so you can join Medium and read everything I post, or I will try to do one of these sum ups when I can, and give you friend links, where you can read each article without being a paid member of the platform.

Part of the reason I am sharing all these with you is because they give you a deeper look at what my family has gone through this year, like my experience with my diagnosis, or what it was like having more people live with our family.

For the sake of time, these will not be aesthetically appealing, sorry.

Top ones about the year:
https://medium.com/the-ascent/when-life-throws-roadblocks-in-the-way-of-your-goals-495318bde35?source=friends_link&sk=7b4437f467810b0bd39b155e2a7ca083'

https://medium.com/swlh/how-to-become-a-i-volunteer-as-tribute-person-and-overcome-the-bystander-affect-3870021ec2?source=friends_link&sk=1278406e3f4a85171a25fb3d2bac2acb


https://medium.com/our-slices-of-life/6-stages-of-processing-my-chronic-illness-to-eventual-acceptance-68272a4a71?source=friends_link&sk=d44926aa46a4253b93af3dd9b9601820


--------------------------------
School

https://medium.com/age-of-awareness/what-one-thing-could-decrease-anxiety-and-improve-reading-at-your-childs-school-1de713db113c?source=friends_link&sk=e37ae7c71f361e07c92ccc8f052da0f1

https://medium.com/age-of-awareness/the-best-gift-to-give-teachers-this-year-912d20dd623?source=friends_link&sk=5263e2138092350bd738b5010be91ab8

https://medium.com/age-of-awareness/why-teaching-history-is-important-3a4c52c9908d?source=friends_link&sk=c43c8612b19de7cc94e932053626e247

https://medium.com/age-of-awareness/its-time-to-ditch-the-archaic-idea-of-age-based-grade-levels-7f0494efddb4?source=friends_link&sk=29df10cfafcad3ede2dda75d10430a62

https://medium.com/age-of-awareness/to-promote-growth-mindset-in-schools-we-need-less-quantity-and-more-quality-assignments-6d20add9fd6c?source=friends_link&sk=af69fca0106017f9e2824e655c9e815c

https://medium.com/age-of-awareness/family-style-meals-could-reduce-school-lunch-waste-948f53012d5?source=friends_link&sk=f640a76a74fea3ceed91ce51efe14be3

Fitness

https://medium.com/live-your-life-on-purpose/how-to-keep-motivation-going-by-placing-a-bet-5c630faf30a0?source=friends_link&sk=c001052b8a3cf7d119047e09e12a1621

https://medium.com/live-your-life-on-purpose/how-to-conquer-a-gym-workout-4269a288a078?source=friends_link&sk=42e26a8db4b65458970f73f7c1436abb

Poem
https://psiloveyou.xyz/decades-of-baked-bread-88a9109f042a?source=friends_link&sk=728bb2041423ce63bf681023435883bd

Parenting

https://medium.com/@lisaolsen_36549/with-some-kids-holidays-arent-just-cheerful-and-bright-a8da77cef8b3?source=friends_link&sk=0f8afc3b53de1685e8504fafb2adda43

https://medium.com/our-slices-of-life/how-kids-can-make-you-a-late-person-65b5ce4377bd?source=friends_link&sk=6c0d0afe7f94b2cb09426d7f68138764

https://medium.com/our-slices-of-life/how-a-lost-tooth-changed-the-holidays-for-our-family-forever-6575cb1b784b?source=friends_link&sk=7d17020614ff560b5e03d0fc9104cc75

https://psiloveyou.xyz/vision-versus-reality-im-not-the-parent-i-wanted-to-be-2d8a4d883247?source=friends_link&sk=9573fcf6ac5479c1db55f65d904f021b


https://medium.com/our-slices-of-life/choose-to-live-the-life-less-recorded-8e520246e18?source=friends_link&sk=6790da27473bd19eb500bcf1e1c07f1c

https://psiloveyou.xyz/did-you-put-on-your-dragonscale-armor-what-i-teach-my-kids-about-bullies-80803d4cc689?source=friends_link&sk=9a3f9ac67f8c863d8e1090200498948b

Fiction
https://psiloveyou.xyz/the-last-morning-12ad1506f975?source=friends_link&sk=e402d81f55014ff89fee1ca1c5db1e70

https://psiloveyou.xyz/waiting-for-a-ring-fbae6144c7f8?source=friends_link&sk=cce65ec047ededd9469d2feba268b12b

https://psiloveyou.xyz/fast-food-in-space-a-mother-and-son-adventure-c63bd483cb1c?source=friends_link&sk=cf47113b904656a83a202ccada4befa4


Random

https://medium.com/@lisaolsen_36549/trump-is-impeached-news-from-both-sides-of-the-track-6852e82d4d16?source=friends_link&sk=2fc1ad25caf9a2bbc24b4633fda1d7df

https://medium.com/@lisaolsen_36549/the-response-missing-from-the-grandma-for-christmas-craiglist-ad-story-50e53c55ea57?source=friends_link&sk=b6d65965b06cd5f014fca89d6bb2b5a0

https://medium.com/our-slices-of-life/what-your-infertile-friends-arent-telling-you-a5bd7d67c31a?source=friends_link&sk=60a8955322815f10a0d526d932678b23

https://medium.com/the-haven/all-clothes-shopping-is-not-created-equal-69cf9ada0cde?source=friends_link&sk=3192da6278a33ce41cc6066a4335055c

https://medium.com/swlh/the-power-of-the-written-word-f981f031e231?source=friends_link&sk=e392ccd3b09797ff02ac3de5516e38a1

https://medium.com/@lisaolsen_36549/a-surprisingly-simple-way-to-reduce-performance-anxiety-47e6ae5e5f7d?source=friends_link&sk=8ce3095608bf2130dece1d013faa2216

https://psiloveyou.xyz/my-relationship-with-rain-11d654ed3e4e?source=friends_link&sk=788e83b6a175c367b34a4d37ccb977c7

https://medium.com/@lisaolsen_36549/when-should-a-baby-use-a-spoon-d0d21591e2ec?source=friends_link&sk=fc94025e328ecab2bdc6574ed8fcddfd

https://medium.com/our-slices-of-life/how-i-went-from-failing-at-pasta-roni-to-hosting-thanksgiving-e3f1ff9be1bc?source=friends_link&sk=03031309f627e64f870bf5bec6d0c947

https://medium.com/@lisaolsen_36549/the-endangered-art-of-pick-up-sports-and-how-to-keep-them-from-becoming-extinct-333305da9bd7?source=friends_link&sk=17f28bec638e58344509ce0fc8d6b583

https://medium.com/swlh/the-best-thing-you-can-do-with-a-rare-condition-ac6a08aabc85?source=friends_link&sk=1a33b29efecb2bdb9c01c266a86017d9

Sigh, that was a lot of tedious work... and I didn't even put them all in by the end. But that is most of what I have written in the last few months, and likely going forward, I will just pick a few favorites to share friend links (aka ways to read them for free).

This year has definitely had its ups and downs, but overall, I think we grew stronger as a family because of the valleys, and appreciated the mountain's calm moments more.

The Best Thing you can do with a Health Condition

As many of you know, I am dealing with Lupus, and possibly Scleroderma in the future, as well as having a daughter with medical needs as well.

In my article on Medium I talk about what I have done to give both my daughter and I the best future possible.

https://medium.com/@lisaolsen_36549/the-best-thing-you-can-do-with-a-rare-condition-ac6a08aabc85?source=friends_link&sk=1a33b29efecb2bdb9c01c266a86017d9

An Ethical Problem for Chidi

As I am home sick, I wrote another piece today as well.

This one deals with the ethical questions surrounding some interesting new research for a cure for Sickle Cell and other genetic diseases.

https://medium.com/@lisaolsen_36549/an-ethical-problem-for-chidi-anagonye-d94b969aad60?sk=4c652ed57e3992a90018c374eb5afb7d

I don't have answers- just questions and hypotheticals on this one.

The Fine Line between Empathy and Pity

To anyone who follows this blog, I wrote another story on Medium titled The Fine Line between Empathy and Pity.

It basically talks about my thoughts on how to handle the news that someone you know is going through a health crisis or major life event, and my own personal experience of when I had my first flare, and how that diagnosis affected my family. I would love it if you would take a moment to read it.

My 35th birthday

I started this blog ten years ago, as crazy as that sounds. Any faithful followers can attest that for the most part it is a relic of the time before I got too busy for it, but it still remains here, and is still something I like to post on from time to time.

I have hopes that someday I will take the time to get all of my most significant blogs onto a google document or something that will feel less likely to eventually be erased from the internet, but that, like most things, isn't high enough priority to get done any time soon.

But these big birthdays feel like they should get a nod, if only a brief one.

The first birthday I wrote about on here was turning 25. I wrote about turning 30, as well as my birthday some other years, but not every year.

So here I am at 35.

It is a strange number to me. Significantly older than 34, on the track to 40. But I am more at peace about it than I expected I would be.

Here is the simple truth. Not written about on here, but at 25, I started trying to have kids, and build our family. It didn't happen right away, or as simple as that, but yes, ten years ago was when we, Blake and I, decided we were ready for kids.

I spent the end of my twenties becoming more and more desperate for those kids, and thinking about our future together, their sports, their activities, who they would grow up to be.

By 30, I did have part of that dream fulfilled, and looking back at pictures of turning 30 and seeing my two kids still so little did make me miss their little days. Yet, though there was lots of joy in taking care of my little baby and toddler... it has not been so long ago that  I have forgotten the tantrums, the potty training, the messes, the daily stress and grind of having two kids under 3 who constantly need you for everything. Those days were draining, exhausting and stressful. Precious too, and I am so thankful for all of the sweet memories I have from those times... but now is better.

Not just in a "enjoy the moment" kind of way, but in a truly, this age is better kind of way. Anyone who knows me knows that school age kids are really my sweet spot, and I LOVE seeing my kids thrive at their activities. I LOVE seeing their writing improve and when they figure out something difficult.

I love their relationship, and how most of the time they can play unsupervised, and get along and have lots of fun together.

My 25 year old self wanted this time. She wanted babies, yes, but more so she wanted the kid time.

I'm here.

I have what I hoped for- a good husband who loves me, and two beautiful kids who call me mom, who were excited to wish me happy birthday, who didn't want to let me go to work this morning.

Honestly, it is hard to imagine that, if you are going on the 5's, another birthday will top this one. By the time I am 40, this era will be past. I will be the parent of a 10 and 12 year old- two preteens. I'm guessing hormones and drama will abound. We will be heading into the time of junior high and high school. And I bet I'll look back on this birthday as such a sweet, awesome time with my kids.

The hardest thing is that I can't stop time. I can't stop them from continuing to grow up, and while I look forward to seeing who they become, it is so hard to not think of them as they are now- still my two primary grade kids.

As for the rest of my slice of life writing for the day- I am learning to de-prioritize goals for now.

Sounds strange right?

As a goal oriented person, there are always several ways that I am trying to improve myself- book goals, cleaning goals, sewing goals, learning a new language etc.

But as mentioned above, this time is short, and my life feels full enough with the kids, my job(s) and the necessities of keeping the house going. If I find free time between that, I want to read a relaxing book, not work through a difficult novel. If I find a few minutes on my phone, yes, these days, I typically pick instagram over my language app.

I will eventually have two grown kids. I will eventually retire. So I can eventually work  on those goals. I have enough stress in my life, and I am paring down my goals for now, so that I can allow myself to enjoy the life that I am living today.

Now, I head off to pick up my kids from school, because they are still young enough to need me to, and I am excited to see them.

New Year, New Writing Platform

I have been encouraged by my aunt, many times, to become a writer in a more real sense than just posting occasional blogs, and in 2019, I have decided to venture out and try.

There is a website, called Medium, where they allow people to publish, and I will get paid if enough people read my stories and like my stories, especially paying members to the site.

I don't imagine I will make a ton of money doing this, but it isn't primarily for money anyways, so I decided to try. I have written two articles so far, and if you follow my blog, I thought I would invite you to head over there, and see what I have written.

Here is my latest:
https://medium.com/@lisaolsen_36549/the-dark-underbelly-of-pinterest-96e8f8b438d5

And my profile:
https://medium.com/@lisaolsen_36549

Please feel free to share these links with anyone you think would enjoy reading what I wrote.

2018 Recap

I started this blog in 2009, as long ago as it seems, and I started my tradition of looking back on December 31st in 2010. The amount of posts per year has varied all the way from my record of 82 in my exciting last year before the kids came, all the way down to my new low of 3 (including this one) this year. But I am consistent in this as my personal New Year's Eve activity.

Looking at my items from the jar, I am reminded first of the couple of trips that we went on. First, in February, Blake and I had a nice little getaway to Cambria, arranged by my mother in law (including taking care of the kids for us). We did some wine tasting, some hiking, and generally enjoyed a beautiful place and relaxed.

This summer, my parents took us to Lake Arrowhead, and the kids and I had a great time at Santa's Village /Skypark. Note that I said that the kids and I had a great time.... Blake not so much. Unpublished on this blog is the fact that Blake broke his leg this summer. He had decided to play some rec hockey after watching how much fun Remington was having, but he turned too quick on his skate, and his leg really hurt, to the point that he couldn't put pressure on it. He refused to go to the doctor until we were up in Lake Arrowhead, because he didn't want to ruin the trip. I forced him to go once we were up there, and sure enough... he had a broken fibula. That put a damper on the trip... and the summer. (It is all healed up now thankfully).

There was a third trip taken this year, but thanks to digital tickets, we don't have any cute souvenirs from it- Blake and I took a one night away trip to Vegas. Though, if I am being honest, it wasn't the best trip. I was feeling strangely tired that night, and had to force myself to stay awake. We went to see a Ducks vs Golden Knights game, which the Ducks lost in a major way. We didn't stay on the strip so we had to walk quite a ways to get to all of our places, and even the buffet, which was tasty, was overpriced for what we could eat, and we decided that next time we would rather just eat at a nice restaurant, instead of a buffet. Basically, for the majority of the trip, we were planning what we would do differently next time. However, the morning of the day we were flying back, we had a great time, being very unconventional, and playing archery tag and doing an escape room together, which totally redeemed the trip.

There are three different sets of season passes there, that I feel deserve a moment on the blog. Summer of 2017 the family trip was to San Diego, and as a part of that my parents were kind enough to get us passes to Legoland. We decided to also get passes to all of the museums in San Diego at the same approximate time. Those both expired summer of 2018, which is why they made it in this jar. But that left a gap, as we had really been enjoying having a place to go as a family to go have fun for the day out of the house at minimal daily cost, so we decided around May to get our family Knott's passes. The sad thing is that Knott's goes until the end of the calendar year, so we didn't have them for a whole year, but we did go enough times that I still feel like we got a good value out of them.

There were a few Ducks games, a few movies and one lonely race bib- though I do feel really good about my Spartan. I trained hard for it, and in the end, only was unable to complete three of the obstacles (earning myself 90 burpees). If you are curious- I couldn't climb the rop, I couldn't figure out the sideways rock climbing kind of thing, and I couldn't get my spear to stick in the hay. But I did successfully cross the monkey rings, and I did get myself up and over the wood walls, even though they were covered with mud from the previous muddy people.

My Grandmother celebrated her 90th birthday this year, and had a nice dinner with our large extended family, and that was nice to be a part of. I also had two really nice dates with my daughter this year- one in the summer where we did nails and then went to the Sawdust art festival, and another where I took her to a mother daughter shopping spree and then we went to a concert together. I look forward to planning more bonding days in the future for the two of us, especially since I felt like Remington got a lot of those when she started school before he did.

But the biggest things this year were not in this jar.

First, I said at the end of my blog last year that I hoped Remington would start playing hockey, since he had been taking lessons for so long. Well... be careful what you wish for. Remington did indeed start hockey at the start of 2018.

His first two seasons started slow, as he was just getting comfortable playing with the other kids, all much bigger than this little 4 year old (you have to be 4 to join the league). He didn't score any goals his first two seasons. But then, summer season, all of his previous training took effect, and he was the second highest goal scorer for the team that season! He scored 9 goals in the summer season.

Apparently this improved playing didn't go unnoticed. After his summer season ended we were approached by the coach of the club team at our rink, and he expressed interest in Remington joining the club team, for their 6 and under team. We hesitated, but decided to go for it, as even though we aren't totally versed in the world of club vs rec sports, we knew that him being asked to join the club team is a big deal. Basically the coach sees a lot of potential in him, and felt that if Remington was part of the team this year, it would make him that much better for next year's club team when he was 6.

Trouble was, he was already committed to baseball... and the rec team... So entered the busiest few months of the year for our family. Remington was juggling three teams, with practices and games for each, sometimes even on the same night (we would have baseball practice, leave from there, and get to hockey practice a little late).

By the end of the fall season, in the 12 games that Remington played (in rec) he had scored 17 goals and 3 assists. He has also scored twice in the club tournaments, against the arguably more difficult teams.

Going into the new year, we will continue to juggle two hockey teams, as his club coach strongly feels that it benefits these young players to play in both. Plus, as noted above, Remington can score in the rec league fairly consistently now... but still has to work hard to get goals in the club games, so it is good for him to have both.

Meanwhile, Grace has completely departed from traditional gymnastics, after it being her life for so long, but she loves her new interests. She is currently in three classes, all not competitive and all focused on growth and learning the skills.

One of her three classes is trampoline (which is still very similar to gymnastics, and that is helping her work towards doing an unassisted flip among other skills), which is the only class taking place at a traditional gymnastics gym.

Her other two classes, while much more off the beaten path, fit her so well, I am extremely happy she has found them. They are aerial silks and parkour. For silks class, it is basically learning how to do the different things on the silk that you see the Cirque du Soleil performers doing. But Grace loves how the silks feel, she is able to use her grip strength and upper body strength to climb the silk, and hang upside down from it, and she is excited to learn new skills on it as she progresses. In parkour, she is learning precision jumps, and vaulting over obstacles, running up walls, hanging from bars, etc. Lots of controlled risky activities, and she just loves it. It combines a lot of what she liked from gymnastics and rock climbing, and put it into one class that she can take to improve. But she also loves the open gym, where she gets to climb bars, do flips into the pit blocks, and basically have a safe(ish) place to try out all the risky stuff she wants to try at every playground.

For those of you keeping track- yes, that does mean that I have to get Remington to three practices a week plus games, plus tournaments and Grace to three classes a week, plus Grace has a cooking class (for now).

AND.... I am currently working three jobs. I still teach Music and Movement at the preschool three mornings a week, but I also have a job as a preschool teacher on Wednesdays, and on Fridays I sub in the Irvine school district.

AND... I have been really consistent with my workouts since last February, typically getting up at 5am so that I can go, work out for 50 minutes, get home, get ready, and go to work for the day.

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For the kids, in 2019, I don't expect a lot to change. More hockey, more parkour, aerial silks and trampoline. Even if she decides to shift what classes she is taking, we have committed to two years at the parkour gym (cheaper price, and lots of class variety if she gets bored), so we will be finding something fun for her to do there. Remington has committed to the club team through the next season, since that was the primary reason he was approached for this one. Since the coach likes rec hockey for these kids, that also commits him to more seasons of rec. We shall see about baseball or other sports, but hockey is his consistent passion- playing with hockey figurines or playing a hockey video game when not playing hockey himself.

For me... I am taking a big leap. I don't plan on teaching at the preschool again next year. It is far from my kids, and I want to be working in the city where they are. I would love a full time job next year, but I need to clear my schedule so I can be available for any local school opportunity that comes my way. But as much as I feel good that this is what I should do... it is a scary step to take, stepping away from a job in hopes of getting another (but the commitment to leave has to come months before I can even interview). The crazy thing is, that even if I get what I want- a full time job teaching in the school district where I live, I am worried about how hard it will be to handle the job and all of the kid stuff. But for now, I am taking it one step at a time.

My wishes for 2019 are simple. I wish for myself, my family and my friends to have a happy, healthy, minimal stress year. Unrealistic? Probably, but I can hope.